So today started a bit later than planned, but we our on holiday after all and it isn’t the military. We tootled off to the tower of Niles, which is a bit of an oddity to be honest. We parked in a Target and walked down the road. It was a little strange. We then drove in to central Chicago and went to the aquarium, which was pretty cool. Spent a couple of hours there then left Illinois. We then drove into Indiana for a couple of hours. Stopped for a quick coffee and then into Ohio. I actually really love Ohio. If there was one state I had to pick to live in, this would be it. It has fantastic fish, nice countryside and great people. It also reminds me very much of England.

We checked into a hotel in Toledo. Unfortunately it has a water park which means its full of kids I want to kill. But it’s now actually twenty to twelve and all is silent so I’ll let them off. Also I’ve drunk three pints of ‘Shock Top’ so they could have a full on rave and I’d be none the wiser.

Tomorrow we are off to Cedar Point, I’m actually really looking forward this.

So this morning we had a bit of a lie in until 8AM. Actually we didn’t get to Six Flags until gone eleven which is a bit crap considering we are less than two miles away. To say it was empty was an understatement. Apart from the usual school groups there was no one. I think all day we waited no longer than forty-five minutes for any ride. One ride said it had an hour wait time, we walked straight on. We did every coaster once, a couple we did twice. It wasn’t a massive park, but it was big enough. We left about an hour before closing after picking up the usual shot glass and fridge magnet. We ate in the hotel. Jamie didn’t like it. Made yet another video which is now uploading. Tomorrow we are off into Chicago again and then off to Ohio.

So we left our hotel in the middle of nowhere and continued east. A couple of pee stops and a very uneventful seven hour drive we arrived at Guerney, which is our home for the next couple of days. We dropped our stuff off and checked in.

We then set off to central Chicago, in rush hour. Took about an hour and twenty minutes for a forty mile journey, but it was great fun. It’s like trying to drive into central London blindfolded without dropping below 90 mph. We managed to park close to the Willis tower, which used to me know as the Sears tower. Up we went to the 103rd floor. Boy what a hell of a view from here. They also have one of those glass bottom floor things which is rather frightening.

We then walked to the worlds largest been, which is just bloody weird. We had an average meal on the way back to the car and then drove back to the hotel. Six Flags Great America tomorrow, the drive will be about three minutes.

We started off a bit later than perhaps we should of. But blueberry pancakes have to be eaton. We grabbed gas and then headed off to Mount Rushmore. We could see it in the distance. My instant thought was, “Is that it?”. We drove up, paid our twelve dollars for a twelve month pass and parked up. I must admit I was expecting half a mountain carved to perfection. What I got as a few carved rocks. Okay, I guess it was quite impressive, it was all carved by hand. But these days the same could be carved by a computer controlled engraver in about ten minutes. I was just expecting more.

The rest of the day was about driving, yet again. We clocked up another six hundred odd miles driving east. Fairly easy going, must be said. Finished up in yet another Holiday Inn. Nice restaurant, decent room. Crap wifi. Can’t complain. Okay, well I can complain. Tomorrow we drive up to Chicago.

Got up fairly sharpish and had breakfast. After refuelling we were on the road by 10:30. Then that was it really. We drove pretty much for a solid nine hours. All the way north up through Colorado. Colorado Springs, then Denver. Then it was up into Wyoming, where there really is absolutely nothing at all, apart from farm land. I think we drove almost three hours without overtaking or being overtaken. It was then into South Dakota. We’ve stopped in a place called ‘Rapid City’, in a ‘Holiday Inn’. Which seems all decked out for another photocopier salesman convention. We were the only one’s in the restaurant, the food was very good though. I had fishcakes made from ‘Walleye’ which is apparently a North American fish, it was very good. Then it was off to the room to edit yet another video.

I’m sorry if these blog posts are a bit short, but the days are very long and the video editing takes ages, so something has to give a bit. But I hope you are all enjoying the videos. They are all available here.

So we started off the day in Grand Canyon village. It was fucking cold. We made a good start and headed down to Flagstaff. Picked up gas. We basically travelled for eleven continuous hours. Passing through the bottom of the Colorado mountains and up the other side. We finally finished in place called Trinidad, Colorado. A nice little Holiday Inn hotel, with a good bar and food. It’s been a hell of a long day, but we’ve managed some serious mileage. And by god have we seen some weather. In Grand Canyon it was cold, then to mass heat, then to massive altitude and freezing again, then snow storms, then calm. It was complete madness. But one thing I will never get over is the shear vastness of this country. One small part is the equivalent of driving from the south-west to Scotland. The sat-nav says it’s over six hundred miles to the next turn off, that’s just shear madness.

One fun highlight, we got pulled over by the highway patrol. The chap was very nice, after the usual questions and license and registration bullshit, he actually only pulled us over for having the sat-nav in the middle of the dash.

More fun driving tomorrow.

So this morning we left Las Vegas and the Trump Tower. Probably a bit later than I would have liked. We soon stopped for gas and a McDonalds. It was then a pretty massive drive to the Grand Canyon. We saw a sign for the Hoover Dam, it wasn’t much of a diversion so we stopped off there. Now there’s a very impressive site. After a few photos we did a near continuous drive to Grand Canyon national park.

As soon as we got out the car we thought, “Fuck, it’s cold”. We started off in Vegas at about 75 degrees, here it was 43 degrees. But we were about four and a half thousand feet up, so the pressure had dropped. Boy was it cold. We took lots of photos and video around the rim, then took a few stops on the bus to get a few different angles. It’s a very impressive site.

Drove to the hotel which was only a couple of miles away. Had a rather expensive mediocre meal. Having a fairly early night, as I have a hell of a lot of driving to do tomorrow.

So this morning started with a fairly easy drive across to Las Vegas private aerodrome. Met with pilot, a fairly gung-ho chap. We got going and all was fairly relaxed. He took the door off his side, which gave a very interesting cross-wind handling characteristic. We flew over the mountains for a bit and then we got permission to fly over the strip. That was great as they don’t usually allow unlicensed R22’s to do that sort of thing. However we had to keep within a 100ft of 3,000 and a minimum of 80kts, which in an R22 is at the upper limit. It was a fantastic hour really enjoyed it.

We then headed out for lunch, we walked for about an hour, decided we were only half way, so jumped on a bus and came back again and then got the car. We went to the ‘Heart Attack Grill’, which hold the world record for the most calories in a triple burger. I went for the double burger and managed to finish it, it was okay, nothing special. But it’s more for the experience. I can back. Jamie fell asleep as he’d had a Tequila and has the drinking ability of a 10 year old girl.

Later in the evening we walked down to the ‘Quad’ and watched ‘Diva’s’ which was a great show of drag queens performing various numbers. The Liza Minnelli performer was excellent. Came back and had a couple of beers. Uploaded tonights video.

So far better than the horrible day that yesterday was. I’m growing to like you, but still have no desire to ever come back again. Grand Canyon tomorrow.

So today started a bit more slowly than planned, but we mad it out the hotel by about ten and into the iHop. Where I consumed pancakes. It was then back into the car and out of Los Angeles. We then spent the first half hour taking wrong intersections but soon settled into it. Apart from a quick pee stop about three-quarters in it was a continuous journey.

I must admit, the scenery was breathtaking. Drive was uneventful. The roads were incredibly straight.

They say that Las Vegas appears out of the desert, I wish it would vanish right back into it again. We got to the hotel no problem. Valet parking, I’m sure that’s the last I’ll see of th sat-nav. Checkin was fine, the room, or suite is fine. It has a jacuzzi and a TV in the bathroom mirror. We had a bath and then took the shuttle bus further down the strip. We then walked to the Planet Hollywood theatre to see Britney Spears. The show was fine, although I did get jumped on by security for videoing the whole thing on a GoPro and he got me to delete it all. I’ll have to wait until I’m home now to do a file recovery on it, but should be okay. Jamie didn’t really enjoy it. Said she didn’t put a lot of effort in. We then walked back towards the hotel and managed to eat at a rather nice Italian at the Venation.

Now here’s my problem with the place. It’s just so tacky, so full of opulence, just so vulgar. You can’t walk down the street without someone trying to thrust a leaflet in your hand about some strip joint or titty bar. It exists for one purpose, thats to take as much money as possible from as many people as possible, to give to no doubt the few. Which is ironic, when we are staying in Donald Trumps place.

Do yourself a favour, if you’ve ever seen the place on the telly and thought it looked great, then savour those memories and don’t come here. I can’t wait to get out of the awful place.

We woke early again. This tends to happen when we go to the US. I don’t know if it’s because we go to bed a lot earlier than we do at home. I think it was well before one when we went to bed last night. Anyway we got ready early and then found out the park opened at 10. We made it there for about half past. Went straight to the new ‘Cars’ ride, there was a massive queue for the fast pass so we joined the stand-by line which actually moved pretty quickly. We got on the ride about and hour and a half later. It was pretty good actually. Nicely themed and executed. Went from there on to California Screamin and then on to Tower of Terror. Managed to get Go-Pro footage from all of them. We had a light lunch which turned into a vast vat of turkey and salad. Then I got my face painted as a tiger and we saw a couple of parades and shows. We did a couple more rides and then it was time to eat yet again. Jamie had already booked for this fine dining place and we had great fish and seafood. Plus we had a pass to get into the best viewing area for the evening show. The show was excellent, even if I did get a bit wet. Great day all in all. Only downer was I got shouted at by some trumped up bird when taking pictures of Goofy. “Sir, if you want to take a picture you have to join the back of the queue.” Now if I wasn’t in a relaxed state I would have just punched the bitch, but as I was standing there in a Disney hat with my face painted like a tiger I decided it was just best to bugger off.

Came back to the hotel and then started to edit the four hours of footage we shot. Did a very rough ‘highlights’ edit which is uploading to YouTube now. I’ll do a more detailed one of the parades at a later date. So had a quick shower and then shot down to the bar as its the only place I get free wi-fi.

Started the upload ect. A quick time-out here. The barman is the same man I saw two years ago, he’s been tending bar at this hotel for thirty-six years. He’s a Mexican chap, but is truly lovely. I came down at eleven-fifty, it closes at twelve. I ordered a beer, he said he was closing up, so queued me up another one. I’m still here at twelve-thirty as the video is processing. He’s left me with a big cup of crisps and a coke to be going on with. He says he’s sixty-six, I hope he’s here if we come back in another couple of years, such a lovely chap.

So tomorrow, really, the road trip really starts and we move on to Vegas. It’s going to be fun, it’s been fun already. The only thing I fear with my bi-polar is the hell of a crash that will come at the end of it, that may very well finish me off. But for the moment, I’m having a great time.