Stop burying my bedroom furniture in the garden you freak.

Had a very odd dream this morning. I was actually in the spare room. It’s fine we haven’t had a falling out, Jamie seems to have developed diphtheria or something. Oddly it only occurred after I’d bummed him, was fine up to that point. He then had a bunged up nose and started snotting everywhere, never knew I could shoot that far. Anyway, he was coughing and sneezing for England, sure he gets some kind of allergy whenever he gets home after being away. Probably dog hair. Back to the dream. For some reason Jamie was burying all my finest bedroom furniture in the garden. This is very odd for two reasons, one, I don’t have and decent bedroom furniture and two it would involve manual labour which we all know Jamie doesn’t do anyway.

Spent the bulk of the day doing an SDK update which is still on going, need to change a hell of a lot for this one. Walked the dogs. Went to the gym and did Pump. Only did it on light weights as I wasn’t really in the mood and also didn’t want to over do it. Now I guess it’s time to phone mother, that’ll be depressing.

“Past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense.”

So today was a return to dull normality. Work started in time. I was very busy all day, mainly sorting out a development conference at the end of June. Lots of things to sort out across various people. Still probably got another day to go just to catch up.

Walked the dogs, Dillon still pulls for England. Finished reasonably on time, then went for a run. By the time I was three miles out the heavens opened and I was stuck in a storm. Still, it washed the t-shirt. I think I’m going to make an effort to try and run with the dogs again. Still have one more part of the video to make. Have some ideas for new videos, yes there will be a new ‘rant’ one coming along.

Updated all the accounts and done all the filing. Now pretty much all sorted.

New York, New York, so bunged up with traffic they named it twice

So we woke to our final day in New York. It was sweltering again. We didn’t have to check out until 3PM. I went down to ‘floor four’ for coffee and muffins. We then ventured out to Times Square, and went to the ‘Body Worlds – Pulse’ exhibition, which was the one by Gunther Von Hagens. This was small but very interesting, lots of plastinated bodies and body parts. Afterwards we went to ‘Macy’s’ and bought pants.

We then wandered back to the hotel, finalised packing and then checked out. The shuttle was already waiting, almost two hours later we arrived at JFK. Checked in and then had dinner. Flight back was painless, it was only six hours, one Martin Scorsese film later and a couple of documentaries and we were back in London. Had to pump the car tyre up again then drove back home.

It was still on one piece. The servers had all worked flawlessly. The grass has shot up nicely. I unpacked. We then collected the dogs which were fairly happy to see us. We then had a long nap for a few hours. I had a bath. Watched some F1 then went to bed. Tomorrow it’s back to work….

If you will block off 90% of the pathway I will fucking walk in front of you

So this morning started late. I mean well late, we didn’t really leave the hotel room until gone 1PM. We walked down to the financial district via the ‘High Line’ walkway, which was a raised walkway built upon an old railway line. I did have a bit of a set-to with a woman who was taking loads of photos of a group from the opposite side of the walkway, so she was blocking the bulk of it off. So I walked right in front of her. Sorry but you can’t block off the whole walkway, not on, get over it.

We walked down t Staten Island ferry, then walked back to the 9/11 memorial. You need to watch the video, it’s a very powerful memorial, very solemn. We visited the museum, we were there for a couple of hours, it was quite emotional.

We headed down to the ferry and took it down to Staten Island, we then transferred back to the one to Manhattan. We took lots of photos. We then took the subway back to the hotel.

Headed out for a local pizza place. Easily the best pizza we have had on the journey. Came back to the hotel and had a cocktail.

That’s almost it, we have an extension on the stay tomorrow and then off to the airport. It’s almost over.

It’s one price for you or a cheaper one if you’re Jewish

So our first full day started in New York. I eventually got Jamie out of bed, he managed to sweat ink all over the pillow. I had muffins and coffee. He just glared at me. Managed to sort tickets for the 9/11 museum and a show in the evening.

We eventually ventured out to the Rockefeller centre. Couldn’t get tickets for a couple of hours so got them for later in the day. We headed to central park.

On the way I picked up a spare battery for the GoPro. It came from a ‘discount electronics store’, which lets just say had a mass abundance of ‘chicken soup’. The battery was offered at $99, then $80, I then got it for $60, even though it was a big battery it was still over the odds, but I needed one in a bit of a hurry.

We went to central park and spent about two hours there, we covered well under a quarter of it. It is one fantastic green space, but boy is it massive. We went back to the Rockefeller centre and went up the tower. I reckon the view from here is probably better than the Empire State. There is certainly more viewing room. Took some good photos from there.

Headed back to the hotel, managed to lose Jamie as he was after a photo in some shop. I decided I wanted to have some fun with the Jewish electronics industry and headed into another one of these discount stores. I got the guy to dig out five GoPro batteries and give me an awful deal on them (started at over $100, went down to $49 quickly), I said I’d give him $50 for all five. He just glared, I then said I could get them from Amazon for $20 and walked out. Sorry, but I don’t like being screwed so was happy to waste his time, it’s good to see they are all into screwing anyone who isn’t Jewish. There are no prices on anything, still, I’m happy with the battery.

We both met up again at the hotel. Only had a few minutes to spare. We headed out. Only to find we didn’t actually know where we were going. Jamie had deleted last nights venue, which was close to tonights. With shear luck we found last nights venue, I then ran down the street (in the road) to be followed by a taxi blowing it’s bloody horn, to make it to the box office. There I picked up the tickets, sweating buckets. Jamie followed me, we settled down in the auditorium. A few minutes later the show started. We saw ‘Forbidden Broadway’. It was in a tiny theatre, about sixteen rows of ten seats. The company was only four and a pianist. We had a understudy to start and by act two another one had died so we had two understudies. There were a lot of references we didn’t get, but the whole ‘Les Mes’ set I almost lost it, I was absolutely pissing myself laughing. It’s a short show with a very intimate audience, but it was very good.

We then wandered round a bit trying to find an Indian. We failed. Went back to the hotel. Spoke to concierge and they found us one. Walked all the way through ‘Hell’s Kicthen’ at ten o’clock at night, that was fun. Found the Indian. After three weeks, if it had been shit it would have been nice, but it was actually pretty good and good value, I really enjoyed my curry.

Wandered back to the hotel. Had a shower, did the first part of the video. At just gone midnight we ventured out again. Which to be honest, on this holiday it’s the latest we’ve been out. We walked down to Times Square, then to the Empire State building. Went up to the observation deck and took more video and photos. It’s was a lovely warm night with no wind.

I must admit since we’ve been here the weather has been sweltering. Even at gone two in the morning it’s been bloody warm.

Now just finished today’s video at 3AM. Having a few beers, which were kindly left by the hotel staff cleaning out the fridge after a few dollars ‘adjustment’.

Not sure what we have planned for the last day tomorrow, we have tickets for the 9/11 museum later in the day.

Goodbye ‘Nellie’, hello ‘NYC’

We managed to get up this morning vaguely on time. We checked out and then did a four hour drive to NYC. Got through the Lincoln tunnel then tried to drop the car off. This was a bit of an adventure as the car drop-off wasn’t actually sign posted, so I pulled into the garage and then got shouted at by a Mexican. After parking in a fire lane and then reversing up a one-way street I managed to dump the car off.

We then route marched to the hotel. This is quite an in-vogue stylish hotel called ‘Yotel’. It’s all very purple. Nice room, great view. Soon it was time to vanish down town to the tattoo shop so Jamie could get inked. It took a couple of hours but the tattooist did a fantastic job.

We then walked back to the hotel, via yet another McDonalds. Had a quick shower and then it was off to Broadway. We saw ‘Kinky Boots’, which was great fun. It’s based on a film, which I’d forgotten I’d seen. No memorable songs, but good anyway.

We then walked back towards the hotel. Stopped in a very disappointing Chinese and had very disappointing food. It was the fastest sit-down Chinese I think I’ve ever had.

Tomorrow I’m not sure about yet.

Washington DC

Today we started off a bit later than perhaps we should of, considering we only had one day here. Anyway, we walked to ‘downtown’ and found the ‘White House’, very impressive. We then walked to the Washington Monument and then the Lincoln Memorial. The buildings and monuments here are very impressive. We then walked to Capitol Hill and the Capitol building, again, very impressive. We finished off at Union Station, took the metro back to the Zoo, which was right by the hotel. We then spent the next few hours at the zoo. It was kind of mixed, the elephants looked bored, but the panda’s were really cool.

We retired to the hotel so Jamie could soak his thighs, he had been moaning all day that his boxers had ridden up and that his thighs were chaffing. He was like John Wayne.

We finished off the evening in a very busy pizza restaurant. Early start tomorrow, back to New York, drop off the car, down to the last leg.

Don’t judge a book by it’s cover

Today was all about driving, and by god did we do a shit load of it. Around nine hours all in all. We started off in Boston. Then drove through New York, Deleware and Baltimore. Before we eventually headed off to DC. Not very eventful there. We had a nice dinner in the pub, served by a waitress who seemed very disinterested and wouldn’t smile if you put dynamite under her lips. But after dessert we got chatting and she spent a good ten minutes talking to us about gay marriage and how it was being passed as law through the various states. She was very much a Christian lady, but she was great, she got a great tip.

Everyone here sounds like ‘Selfie’ girl

This morning started with a reply from the front of house manager. He didn’t offer to fall on his sword but he did offer complimentary high speed internet and some sort of lunch offering. I accepted the internet but said a bottle of water would be fine.

We decided to drive out to Salem first. So it took a little while to get there, but it’s only a few miles away. It’s a strange little place. If you ever imagined creepy wooden house, yep, they are all here. We didn’t really visit anywhere in particular, but had a wander around the area and took photos for a few hours.

Came back, changed and then took the water taxi back over to the city. We walked to the start of the ‘freedom trail’ and then spent the next two hours walking to the end of it. Took lots of photos and video on the way. Picked up some water and beer and took a taxi back to the hotel. To where we found a selection of water and beer. Better late than never.

Made new videos, uploaded loads of photos and drank beer. Tomorrow we are off to Washington DC.

Hyatt you are shit

Now I’m going to work backwards as basically the day was rather dull. We got up and drove for seven hours. If you want to hear all the glorious details of that then watch the video. We drove to the Hyatt Harbour side, which would be nice if it was anywhere near town, it’s actually on top of the air port. It’s outrageously expensive, the parking is extortionate and the wi-di not only isn’t free, but if you pay for it it’s incredibly slow and capped. Considering a Holiday Inn can offer this for half the price it’s very disappointing. I’ve already written a terrible TripAdvisor review. I’m going to bed now, I’m quite outraged, and before you ask, no I haven’t been drinking, we actually had a lovely meal across the water, probably the best fish I’ve ever eaton.

I’ve just sent their customer services an email. I now expect a swimming pool full of water heading in my direction.