Christmas was just so very last year

So here we go again, what I find the most depressing day of the year by far. If ever there was a reason to keep 4Kg of Fluoxetine in reserve it’s for today.

I’m sure its started how it’s meant to continue, pissing down. I was hoping to go out for a nice long walk with the dog and clear my mind a bit. But like the whole of Christmas it’s just continuous rain. It’s made the whole week very boring to be honest, normally during this week it’s a bit of DIY then some nice long walks, it’s normally chilly but dry. This year it’s been wet beyond belief. It’s really got me down.

So one good thing, my new Wine Making book turned up, so spent a couple of hours this morning with a nice coffee, my book and the farting dog. Jamie was working.

Got up and looked at the weather, still raining. So it was time to do a few house keeping computery things. Installed new virus software, updated various machines and things, a lot more of that to do tomorrow.

Then turned the lounge into a late 80’s rave scene, complete with lasers and a selection of tripe from I-Tunes.

Had lunch, by this time the rain had eased. Took dog for a walk, within three minutes it was torrential again but thankfully it didn’t last. We managed to get a good hour in.

So here I am, five to five. Listening to Paul O’Grady’s Christmas show on iPlayer. Oh, quick shout out to dad, he died I think nine years ago last night. He was another one who hated new year, and by dying just before it made sure everyone else would hate it forever more as well.

Let’s go then, what’s happened this year, what’s been good, what’s been shit, what did I care about and quite frankly what didn’t I care less about. I guess the major thing this year was the Civil Partnership. That came about last years new years eve. When we decided that wouldn’t it be a great idea to do it. So we did. To be honest the decision to do it seems like 10 minutes ago, but the actual ceremony itself seems like it was 10 years ago. It was a good day, it really was. Oddly it’s one of those things that really I would have not changed a thing, well if anything maybe I would have come up with a list of photos to take as I’m sure we are missing a few. The Honeymoon was great. LA was fantastic, San Francisco was hilly. All those coasters were great fun. Route 1 was one of those bucket list things, now ticked off. The deer incident was a shame, but it’s all life affirming….but not for the deer.

The weather this year has been basically shit. I think I’ve managed one semi disappointing walk and been on the bike about twice.

Karting wise, I’ve done one race. It had some fun bits, but some awful bits as well. Oddly not down to the kart or the team, but other peoples attitudes. When after practise you have to have a two hour meeting discussing engines between all the teams you know it’s just gone too far. It’s a great shame, I used to really enjoy it. But now it really is all about money. The more you are prepared to spend the faster you will go. When I first started, engines were tuned in your own garage. We didn’t have dyno’s or anything fancy, we just listened. You knew when your engine was on song or not. Now you turn up to a race meeting and would look out of place unless you had a 50,000sqft awning and at least 20 engines to choose from. It’s no longer a sport for small teams of wanabee formula one drivers, It’s a sport for people with really bad attitudes, no sportsmanship and formula one budgets. There was talk back in the summer of Paul and I investing in a new chassis and taking it round the Northern circuits. I haven’t heard any more since, quite frankly I don’t really mind. If anything happens it will happen, if it doesn’t I don’t think I’ll miss ever sitting in a kart again. Certainly my ribs won’t.

Okay, other highlights. Well other than the wedding to be honest it’s been a bit of a dull year. Proms in the Park was fun. That was actually a really great weekend other than the shit hotel. I discovered I liked ‘The Average White Band’. Kylie was shit, much better in Orlando.

Turkey this year was okay but nothing special. Jamie announced he no longer likes that type of holiday. Well he can pay for the next one. It will be shit.

I’ve learnt a few things. Mainly about boilers and heating systems. My belief in plumbers has been asserted….they are all shit. DIY, really haven’t done bugger all. Dug a bush out of the front garden. Did quite a lot of clearing up work in the back garden. Again this has mostly been down to the weather. Internally I haven’t really done much at all. I think I’m going to give up on the dinning room, after over two years on one wall I really do think it’s time to give up and get someone else in.

I bought a wine fridge. I bought a beer fridge. I gave up my paper diary in the middle of the year and started this blog. Oddly I’ve kept this going, I kind of enjoy it. Knowing that I’m getting a thousand hits a week from people who never comment but do hang around the pages long enough to read….yes I can tell that. I learnt an awful lot about Linux, especially Ubuntu 12.04LTS. I had a hell of a lot of fun with it. Proxy has been retired and the new server installed. Then after I found it cost more to power that than a small town I built a new lot of hardware, both for that and the pfSense box. Ah, pfSense, there was another bunch of fun. All conquered since, but gave me many an evening of grief but in the end a whole lot of enjoyment.

I stopped anti-depressants. To be honest I wish I was still on them. Even after the dog, which helps a lot, I still get some very very low days. I tend to just get spaced out and let it ride over me. Those are the days I avoid the wine, otherwise I’d never wake up again.

The dog has been great. She’s certainly improved after going to ‘Doggy Daycare’. Her social skills are a lot better. She still needs some work though and this year I’m committed to getting some good training in for her. Then may be then we can go on long and exciting walks together off her lead and I won’t have to worry about if she’s going to eat the next dog she comes across.

So I now have a bit of a new hobby right at the end of this year, Wine Making. It’s a hobby for old bores so should suit me right down to the ground. Actually it’s very involved, but does require waiting around a lot. I’ve bought the gear and got some for Christmas. The smell of the Strawberry Wine is wafting down the stairs now. Won’t be ready for a couple of months.

So karting is pretty much out of the window as I said. It’s very expensive and to be honest I’m just not as young as I was when I started. I have the fitness, but the bruises just hurt that little bit more. I haven’t down climbing in a couple of years since Gary moved to London. That is something I do really miss. I want to get back into that again this year for sure, need to get a new climbing partner. Top rope was fine, but leading to be honest I always found a bit too scary, plus I saw far too many people breaking their legs. If I wanted to break bones I’d do it driving at 120mph into a barrier on a tea tray, not falling six foot off a wall.

Need to do a bit more DIY as well. Certainly I’ll get someone in to do the dinning room. I’m still threatening to get someone in to do the on-suite as well, but as yet no one can really be arsed to give me a quote. People say there isn’t any work around, well there is, you just need to get off your fucking asses.

Work wise, well that’s been interesting. This year has been a mixture of being very slow and uncertain and being uncertain and very slow. Thankfully at the end of the year many of the issues have seemed to have been resolved, I even got paid some money I was owed which was nice. I got to work on game that I really enjoyed, was quite proud of and it even got rave reviews. There’s more of that game to come I think in future which will be good. Also I’m now working on something completely different for a bit, but I now have the confidence it will have the budget and the man power required so I can plough on with it in the new year…well Wednesday anyway. So that’s ending on a high, I’m sure it will all go shit again, it usually does.

Jamie and I are still ignoring each other so nothing changes there. One day, on his day off I would really love for him to turn round and say “Is there anything that needs doing?”. It will never happen, but I live in hope. Also may be he would tidy up once in a while. Again, I won’t keep my hopes up. I love him dearly (there I said it), but sometimes he does make it a little hard when I can’t get to the bathroom as it’s waist high in clothes, or I run out of plates as they are all stacked up in various states of mouldiness in his room.

I failed once again to shag Dillon Samuels. Although I did have quite a deep conversation with his partner Kyros Christian….about red wine.

So there we go. The end of the year. It’s new years eve. It’s now twenty five to six, so a full half hour of waffling. Andy and Lisa are coming round tonight. I’m sure it will be fun but somehow I always feel I’m missing out somewhere. Really I want to be out in some club dancing to late 80’s trance rather than drinking Foster’s and trying to be the life and soul of the party over a snack sausage roll. No offence to anybody, you may think it’s me but really it isn’t. I think it’s all down to the new years eve depression thing again. Either that or a misspent youth, or in my case not so much misspent youth. But that really is a story for another day.

I’m going to wrap up now and save off the draft as I do have all those sausage rolls to prepare. I’ll finish this off later, probably in a more intoxicated state.

Well, all over now. A bit of a damp squib really. We drank various things, talked about Tesco’s. Sat around staring out of the window. Jamie cooked more hot food, we had enough to feed about fifty people. I did full on rave dancing to some heavy trance with the dog. I had two cans of lager and a couple of glasses of wine. Lisa had about two bottles. The Cava was oxygenated a bit too much. Next year I vow to do something different as it really was just a little bit dull with everyone working in the morning.

We decided to do a couple of activities this year, thankfully no civil partnerships. Let’s see if we can pull them off. Meanwhile there’s all the tidying up to do. Oh yeah, and the tax return. Roll on 2013.

Apparently banging Jamie on the ‘taint’ and going ‘moo’ isn’t the way to arouse him

So started the day off with not really wanting to start the day. So watched one of the ‘Royal Institution Christmas Lectures’ instead. It had lots of explosions, can’t beat a good bang. So that gave me a fairly fruitless idea, I was going to get Jamie aroused. I tried all the usual stuff, talking about whales, pointing out his wobbly bits and getting his nipple up like the end of a Biro, all without too much success. I then found out that the bit between the balls and the ass hole is called the ‘taint’, as in ‘ain’t the ass, ain’t the cock’. There is some confusion over this that some people think it should be called the ‘Gooch’ over some guy who apparently they couldn’t decide if he was a cock or an arsehole. Anyway I found that slapping him on the ‘taint’ and ‘mooing’ also wasn’t bringing about any kind of eroticism so I got up and picked up all the dog shit from the garden.

We then went to Cribbs, where he went into Game and bought something confusing and I went into John Lewis and bought a selection of cheese knives. Then came back and put said knifes on wall. Didn’t like the position so re drilled it and moved it again. I then spent the rest of the remainder of the afternoon balancing radiators and updating my movie blog. “Untraceable (2008)” “A perfect getaway (2009)” “Case 39 (2009)”

I think the radiators are almost finally there, need to go around and do one last check, but all seem to be heating up nicely now and I’m getting my 12 degrees between flow and return. I must turn the water heating back on soon as yes, it’s almost time for a bath.

Quite a few things to get on with tomorrow, still not overly happy with my cheese selection.

The three wise old farts gather for a curry

Didn’t start the day particularly early as the rain was hammering down and I wanted to take the dog out for a decent walk. In the end I ended up walking her in the rain anyway.

Came back and did a few odd bits, then went and did the shopping in Tesco’s. As we are having a small bash on New Year’s I bought a selection of party food. Well more of a horde. I think we are going to be eating party size pasties until March. I’m still not entirely happy with the cheese selection though.

Came back and made myself look pretty. Tonight I was meeting up with Martin who I hadn’t seen since the wedding and Steve Teague who I hadn’t seen in about eight years. It was only at the local Indian. Met up with Steve first, who hasn’t really changed much other than expanded somewhat. Martin arrived after a bit, he never changes, looked middle aged when he popped out of the womb. We’ve all turned in to moaning old bitter bastards. Which to be honest we always were anyway, so nothing really has changed. It was nice meeting up again and probably won’t get the opportunity again for another eight years.

Came back, we had coffee, they were mugged by the dog. I then settled down and watched some torture porn. You often think in life, ‘Would I have changed anything?’, yes I would, a hell of a lot.

Three old farts at the Indian

We can’t suck our bellies in for much longer.

It’s a balancing act (Yet again)

Started the day off reading Kindle books on wine making. Doesn’t seem so much as a dark art, more of a severe chemical reaction. Ordered a couple of books as it’s something I’d like to thumb through, also ordered bigger barrels to do the 30 bottle kit.

Walked the dog. She has been farting like a trooper after last nights curry. So thought she needed to run around and degas for a bit so we played with a ball in the garden for half hour. She was suitably tired and took about four shits, all of them had a certain aroma of Chicken Tikka.

I then drove to Cribbs, went in Halfords and bought a funnel then went into Maplin and got served by a real miserable shite. I then walked around the Mall thing, admired cheese boards in the John Lewis sale. Didn’t buy anything.

Came back and de-scaled the coffee machine. I then decided that now that everything has been tested and working on the heating it was indeed time to re-balance the whole lot again. I have my new gadget now so it’s just a matter of adjusting the lockshields and waiting for the temperature differential to reach 12 degrees. Which is why I’m now typing this sat on the floor in the guest bathroom. This valve is a tricky one as it’s the first one in the run, it’s currently on 9.5 degrees, I think that’s about as close as I’m going to get it.

Ended up slowing the pump down again as I still seem to be getting air into the system. So I’ve now got the radiators upstairs fairly well balanced, although the lockshields on them are almost fully closed, I thing the last one upstairs is about one turn open. But measuring the temperature across the last radiator in the circuit I’m getting back on 12 degrees and that lockshield is fully open. Across the flow / return on the boiler I’m over getting 7 degrees, I’d prefer closer to 12. Still have all the downstairs to do and recheck, but that will do for this evening. I finally turned off the heating circuit and enabled the water circuit. I’m actually getting about 14 degrees across the tank with the lower pump speed, so it’s good to see the water tank is way more efficient at dumping heat than the whole of the radiator system. Hopefully that will mean that the water heats up quickly, then of course I can have my bath….

Mid position valve – The final chapter

Ok, after eventually getting up I stripped the valve down properly this time. The mechanism was all a bit bent and the micro switches were missing the blades, this was all probably down to years of heat expansion / contraction though. Nothing really wrong that a bit of plier manipulation and some WD40 didn’t sort out. So then it was on to the actual valve bit itself. It has very little movement, probably 30 degrees at best. So I attached a big adjustable to it and forced it over to the B side, which is water only, I then fired up the boiler. With my posh new differential thermocouple machine I was managing to get a temperature differential of about 20 degrees, so that all looked fine. I then moved the valve over to the A side, which is heating. This is where I thought I had a big problem as I wasn’t getting much of a differential at all, plus at times it was actually negative, so the water was hotter than the heating. I checked all the valve again, free movement, so I was thinking the valve was leaking on one side. Then I had lunch, and that visionary moment, where you think, ah yes, big tit. So what was actually happening was quite simple. On the A side of the valve is the nice very long collection of pipes doing the heating, containing many litres of water. On the B side is quite a short loop just going to the water tank. The water tank contains about 60 gallons of water at about 55 degrees. So what happens when you move the valve to the A side? Well the B side now just contains stagnant water, which is being heated in a massive heat exchanger in the water tank. So as there is no flow, the water tank will now be heating the water, not the boiler, it’s all acting in reverse. So what I did was turn off all the hot water heating on the programmer, then throughout the day I just used all the hot water as normal. Then sure enough when the heating comes on I’m now getting a 30 degree temperature drop across the valve as the B port pipe now contains nothing but cold water. So finally in conclusion, apart from the actuator being a little big old and knackered and could probably do with replacing at some point, there is actually nothing wrong with the valve at all.

Went to Tesco’s picked up food as mother was coming to dinner. Then spent the afternoon in a mixture of cleaning and wine making. I bought a kilo of Strawberries and a huge bag of sugar. Then using my new wine making stuff I proceeded to make a Strawberry fruit wine. Well I now have a bucket of fermenting something or other anyway.

About to have a shower when I decided to go outside and tell the taxi that was waiting that he should actually be at my mothers rather than my house, he read the source and destination the wrong way round. At least that company is cheap.

Jamie was finishing at 8, mother arrived just after 7. I must admit both her and the dog were very well behaved. She only came out with a few dull anecdotes. Managed to get her on a good quality red wine and she enjoyed the food. She only gets fed once a year so good she enjoyed it.

After she went Jamie decided it was then a great time to put the Sonic Meccano together. Getting stickers on the right way round after a couple of bottles of wine was an interesting challenge. Still good fun had by all.

And this is Boxing Day

So today started in the afternoon. Not because of any ill effects of the night before, I felt all fine and dandy, but just because we couldn’t be arsed to get up and the only thing we had planned was to go over to the mother-in-law’s anyway, and I wasn’t in a major hurry to do that. So we stayed in bed and watched the Christmas ‘Doctor Who’ episode, which wasn’t too bad this year, if a little random in places.

We did eventually get up and then pack the dog off into the car and drove, well almost sailed there was so much standing water, to Weston. The dog then proceeded to be mainly a pain in the ass for the next couple of hours. I had wine related gifts, Jamie had plenty of tat and the dog got a bone. We left after demolishing all the food.

Got home, tidied up. Red instructions for wine making kit again, looks like I have to buy lots of things and then buy more things that’s aren’t in the kit. Still, got to start somewhere. So Jamie has used all the hot water, so need to wait for that to recharge before I can have a bath. So tomorrow then it’s looking at the mid position valve and then may be some wine making. Mother is coming over for a curry in the evening, I’ve booked a car for her.

So this is Christmas

Woke up early, mainly because Jamie was snoring like a train. So stripped down part of the mid position valve at 6AM. Then went to sleep in the spare room, where I slept quite soundly until the dog discovered where I’d got to at about half eight.

So breakfast served and dog de-peed, Santa had left a stocking by my coffee machine. Went back to bed (same one as Jamie this time), unwrapped contents of stocking, mainly chocolate based. Got up, I walked the dog, together with what seemed like the rest of Bradley Stoke dog owners. Came back, Jamie had got up by now. We unwrapped presents and were vaguely nice to each other. Jamie got a PS Vita, I got a home brew kit.

Then we sorted everything out, packed the dog away and then got picked up by mother. Went over to my sisters. There’s Shaun cooked a lovely lunch as usual. My mother proceeded to tell countless anecdotes with no to them whatsoever. So was dressed in a floral flock wallpaper style dress, I’m sure I’ve eaten in a booth covered with the same material before. My sister wore a sort of brown number and looked a bit like a tubby Lara Croft. The rest of us made no effort, except Jamie did wash.

We stayed there until mid afternoon when we came back home to sort the dog out. I promptly fell asleep. Jamie then woke me ten minutes before we were being picked up again. So quick shower and then we returned. We then ate various party food and I fell asleep again. Between me and my sister I think we cleared off about eight bottles of wine. We ended up playing Pictionary, the answer to everything was of course ‘Vagina’. My mother then made a rather interesting faux pas by calling the youngest nephew a ‘faggot’, Jamie then berated her for the next half hour about it, she kept saying that ‘she didn’t mean it like that’. I just tried to explain that he wasn’t a faggot but merely a medium height potential homosexual. Anyway good night had by all. We returned, drank more lager and ate cheese and pineapple while watching Christmas TV.

Nice relaxing Christmas eve, installing a new central heating programmer

So started the day off fairly early, considering I had the day off. Went to TLC and bought a new central heating programmer after working out the old one was fairly knackered. Got a rather nice Horstmann seven day one, dual channel for water and heating, all LCD, all shiny shiny. Parked up in Cotham and walked into town, it wasn’t that busy considering. Bought a new wall planner. Got back, had lunch. It’s still officially a Monday, so Chicken sandwich it was. Then walked the dog.

Then decided to crack on with replacing the programmer. So started with putting a big hole in the airing cupboard for the cable to go down. This was fine, except the original wiring centre appears to be mounted on some sort of batten and the existing wires are coming through it, so no way on earth I’m going to get behind it, so instead have to come out slightly above it and bring the cable out there, then surface mount it to the wiring centre. Anyway, got the back plate mounted and wired. Then tried to get the timer on, there was no way it wanted to fit. Removed back plate from wall, still no go. Then unwired it all, no chance. So removed all the slot connecting things, then finally it fitted. Turns out that it requires a huge amount of force to get the damn thing to close up and connect properly, so wired it all back again and gave it a big shove, now it was mounted. So back to the wiring centre, I just connected the earth, live and neutral and fired it up, all appeared to be working fine. I used six core and earth cable. Every core was black apart from the earth, but each was individually numbered on the insulation sheath which was very strange. So then removed the old programmer wiring, which ascended somewhere from the kitchen and replaced with the new one. Then removed the old programmer from the kitchen and rewired all that behind a blanking plate. All appears to be working fine, so programmed it up.

My other new gadget arrived today, which is a dual thermocouple temperature reader. This basically means you can clamp a sensor to both flow and return pipes and it will give the temperature differential. I’ve got this at the moment stuck on the A/B outlets of the mid-position valve. Even though it’s going through the internal motions I’m still not convinced it actually works at all, I’m getting very little differential between A/B when it goes through the three modes. I think I’m going to whip the mechanism off the top and check that the valve under it is going through it’s full range of movement. Certainly the spring arm seems to be shot on it.

And there we go, that was my fairly productive day. Christmas day tomorrow. It’s still a Monday though, so salad as usual. I may have a glass or two of wine though.

My ass is a temple. Just because you look like Buddha doesn’t mean you can enter it

Started the day off somewhat slowly and watched plenty of items on iPlayer. Finally got up and had lunch. Jamie was working today. Took the dog out, she was being a pain in the ass so that was fairly short.

Came back and finally looked at the heating timer, it is indeed fucked, the heating terminal is permanently live no matter what the switch is set to. A nice job for Christmas.

Finally got round to wrapping everything up. Didn’t make a particularly good job of it, mind you I didn’t exactly put much effort into it either. So that’s all done. Did some hoovering and a little bit of cleaning ad no cleaners this week. Looked at heating timers, think I’ll go for the Horstmann one, it’s a bit more expensive but I already have a Horstmann thermostat that I have been taking house to house and that’s always worked flawlessly. So pick that up tomorrow and probably wander into town as well. No gym, as it’s closing early, tut. Bath and wine time I think.

Don’t worry dear I’m sure it just shrunk in the wash

Started this morning with Jamie trying to find something green to wear. He asked to borrow something of mine, except mine is all size small. He then squeezed into something red, to which I said “Don’t worry dear I’m sure it just shrunk in the wash”.

Watched several things on iPlayer as it was hammering down with rain. When it reduced to a drizzle I took the dog out. Then ventured into Tesco’s and did the shopping. The shop itself wasn’t too busy but the car park was fairly rammed.

Had lunch. Then decided to pick up some sand for the lizards. This is for their tanks, not some kind of play pit. So got that, then ventured into Maplin, where I bought various tat. Parked up on Whiteladies Road, paid a fortune on parking then decided it really was far too wet to be going anywhere, so bought a tin of chopped tomatoes and went back to the car. Drove to mothers, picked up my Christmas cake, and very nice it is too.

Came back, attempted to fix a toy fruit machine, failed, put said machine in bin. Did the accounts. Cried over being paid money I was owed, well didn’t cry over that bit, just the two grand of tax. What the lord give ‘uth the tax man take ‘uth away.

I’m now going to empty the dish washer, let the dog out for a piss then take a bath. Tonight once again I’m making a curry. And no it’s not bloody Turkey curry. Tomorrow I look at the heating timer, I can hardly contain the excitement.