Start the year off with excitement, I filed my tax return

This morning I actually got up fairly early, well for me anyway. As I drank less last night than I probably would on a school night. Had a coffee and then started on the clean up operation. That took about an hour, considering the amount of food I got, we did get through a hell of a lot of it. All I was left with was some mini scotch eggs and cocktail sausages, or a cock and balls, first shit gag of the year.

Had another coffee. Took the dog out, she escaped out of her harness trying to attack another dog but was saved by her emergency collar attachment. She still needs some work.

Came back and got hold of one of the home checks on my list. Quite a long way away past Thornbury (out of my usual area). A lucky dog though, big old farm house with masses of land.

So then came back and did the yearly filing, this is the chore of going through the entire filing cabinet and removing everything from 2010 and sticking it in a box in the loft that will never be opened. I have boxes dating back to 1998 in my loft. Correction I have boxes dating back to 1998 in my mothers loft. She could go up there and open them and look at my bank statements, then weep.

After that I logged into the on-line HMRC portal and filed my tax return. It took about ten minutes. They owe me thirty-seven quid. I’m pleased with the way the tax system works with gift aid. Even though on the outside I appear to be a complete tight miserable bastard (99.9% true) I do however donate a huge amount to charity. Actually only animal charities, everyone else has pissed me off in one way or another, I could rant for hours about spending two pounds a month saving children in Southmead from becoming Chavs…Anyway I give about three grand away, it actually costs me about eighteen hundred and the charity can then claim the lower rate tax back on that as well. The great thing about is that the only person who gets fucked is the government and I get this warm feeling that I’ve saved the lives of probably a dozen dogs this year. I may have been bitten by one as a kid, but I’ve never been thrown across the room by one, hit by one or raped by one, so they actually rate quite highly on my scale.

Changed the wall planner, oddly on the wall. It’s a boring Ryman one these days, used to be a karting one, but that’s all gone tits. Then that was it well almost…

Went down stairs and watched some telly, Jamie was at home by this stage, asleep on the bed, as he’d got up for a 9AM shift at about 9:30, had a hard day doing nothing. Apparently he didn’t have much sleep, not sure why, we were in bed by 1AM, which is a hell of a lot earlier than he usually manages. He’s still asleep now.

Had a bath. Drank some wine. Then did a very odd ceremonious thing, I took the year 2008 from my old Filofax. This is the one I kept since the age of 16. I took the pages out and put them in a labelled envelope with ‘2008’ on it. And put them in the drawer together with all the other envelopes from 1988 onwards. Before I sealed it, I did have a quick read through…I couldn’t make out a single fucking word of it, the handwriting was absolutely appalling. Still at least this on-line version may stand the test of time, unless I change languages or lose the ability to type. I wouldn’t actually put that past me, I’ve certainly lost the ability to write a long long time ago. I will continue to do the Filofax filing ritual every year until it’s empty, I will then take a photo of it, publish it in this blog and then bin it. I think that will be an apt end for one part of my life. Anyway, that’s the first day over with, and to be honest, it was fairly shit.

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