Well I wasn’t expecting a sea view from the Jacuzzi

This mornining started from the end of last night. We went to bed at about one thity after consuming fish. Nothing wrong with that except we had to beup at four. So we spent the next twenty minutes bumming, it was actually quite nice to go at it without a canine audience. I then spent the next three hours not sleeping, Jamie was happily snoring away. So the alarm went off at 4AM. We piled into the car and drove to Bristol airport. We were then confronted with a queue 3 miles long for the EasyJet bacg drop, thankfully it all moved pretty quickly.

We went through security and picked up some smellys in the duty free. Flight was a bit bumpy but otherwise uneventful. The transfer was just over an hour. We were on a bus with eight other people, to be quite frank if I stayed in any of the hotels it stopped at I would be suicidal, I’d seen more welcoming travel lodges. Thankfully when we came up to ours it was on it’s own Island, with a private causeway. Checkin was brisk but courtious. We had a welcome cocktail, an upgrade and a blokie take ho drove us to our room angling for a tip (he didn’t get one).

Room, well what can I say, we pretty much lucked out on this one. We have a full see view, from the end of the king size four poster bed. We also has a full sea view from the jacuzzi bath and the balcony which is in a seperate lounge. We have a walk in closet, if you wanted to come out of it, this would be the perfect one to choose.

I unpacked, then I put far too much bubble bath in the jacuzzi, set the motors on. It was rather loud but also rather fun. There was more foam than a DFS sofa. I got in the bath and opened a beer while looking out into the sea. I called Jamieover who then woke up and joined me. He then started massaging me for about half an hour and managed to produce a prize winning hard-on (me not him). I then bent him over the bath and bummed him senseless. I then used the rather impressive shower that had a head about the same size as mine. We had a little kip for an hour and then tarted up for dinner. Well I put on a clean t-shirt and Jamie got the latest outfit from the ‘one-direction’ selection on. We then vebtured through the maze of alleyways and found the restaurant. To say it was a bit empty was an understatement, no wonder we got a room upgrade. Wine was served by the glass which was somewhat a dissapointment. I will need to have words about that tomorrow. First course wasn’t good, I had cold chips and even colder pasta. Still second time round we found the grilled section and I had some lovely seabass and a chicken kebab. Followed by some rather sweet puddings, mind you it was quite difficult to find one which wasn’t doused in coconut. We then found a bar which is where I’m at now. There don’t seem to be many people here which is good, there don’t seem to be any kids which is better. There are a bunch of fairly fit Germans, but the jury is out on those until I see them in their swimwear collection. I do have a gut sat on the table behind who is trying to break some sort of sneezing world record. And he’s drinking coffee, he has this all wrong. Jamie is drinking some blue cocktail, I’m sticking to the beer. I haven’t slept in 48 hours, been forced to have sex three times and Mr. nose is going full force behind me. The clientell does seem somewhat posh, I’m yet to meet a Sharon from Essex or any one from Wales. I’m now descending into my beer googles and probably going for an early night. Jury is still out on the hotel, will have to sample the breakfast, the sun beds and the Germans. First impressions are pretty good, but if the guy behind me doesn’t shut up, I’m going to jam a wine bottle up hid nose.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *