Give a toddler a bone and that’s child cruelty, give a dog a bone and she thinks it’s Christmas.

Busy day today with trying to finish off the mobile game. Fixed various problems in routing tables. Also had a lot of other minor stuff to fix and found a couple of crash issues. Only just finishing up now, so will keep this brief. There was actually a post on our internal work forum to do with depression and coping day to day, so I thought I’d add to it with my thoughts. I’ve removed some of the names, but it’s pretty much verbatim.

I know you’ve already taken my advice and got a dog X and I hope that it’s brought you and your family some happiness. Here are a few other tit-bits for managing day to day (just my opinions).

1) Get a dog. Dogs are great. But if you are considering one then please go to an animal shelter rather than a breeder or puppy farm. There are loads of really lovely dogs looking for a new home, and like marrying an ugly woman they will always remain grateful. If you need a change of scenery take the dog for a walk, if you want a quick break throw a ball round for a bit, when you’re done, dog will curl up and go to sleep. They are energy efficient and cheap to run (A* energy rating), I have a self cleaning model, she goes to sleep muddy and wakes up clean (unlike my self cleaning oven, which I’ve never once seen attempt this feat). You no longer require a doorbell. There is no need to remove crumbs off the kitchen floor. Unlike children they do not require clothes, education, their own room or a mobile phone. Give a toddler a bone and that’s child cruelty, give a dog a bone and she thinks it’s Christmas.

2) Get a good wine supplier. I recommend (I always have vouchers available). Whether it’s red or white, independent vineyards always come out on top.

3) Get a cheap wine supplier. I recommend TescoWines. When you’ve had a bottle of the above and really appreciated the fine taste, you can then move on to the Isla Negra as you no longer care.

4) Get a good coffee machine and good coffee (I recommend talking to X about this). Fine wine is good, but at 10AM when you have a dozen walk grids to hand edit then reaching for a bottle of Chardonnay is not the answer, getting a large mug of fine arabica is though.

5) Get a gym membership and use it. Being stuck behind a desk all day isn’t good for you. Get some good exercise. If a treadmill is not your thing then try a class. I do ‘Body Combat’, it’s great fun.

6) Steer clear of anything like ‘living life to the full’, been there, done it, it’s shit. I don’t want to know about how to eat an elephant (Answer, One chunk at a time). I find self help books and courses do not work for me at all, others may have had success though.

7) If you require it and a lot of people do at one time or another, choose your medication carefully. Citalopram, Sertraline and Fluoxetine, all good (Citalopram made me sweat a lot). You get amazing dreams. Steer well clear of Amitriptyline, your head will be on a different planet to your body and you’ll spend all day poking your mouse wondering why it doesn’t squeak. To get off antidepressants see 1.

8) Avoid fad diets. You’ll stick to it for a couple of weeks then you’ll see a cream cake in a shop window and that’ll be the end of it. Just eat sensibly and do a bit of exercise now and then. I’m currently addicted to cheese.

9) Life’s too short, so get somebody else to do the stuff you don’t want to do. DIY is great if you enjoy it, but if you haven’t got round to painting the bathroom in 3 years, it really is time to get someone else in.

10) Get a cleaner. (See 9.)

11) Get a pool boy. (Even if you don’t have a pool, this may only be applicable to me though.)

12) Avoid render.

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